#RIPLKY

I would like to express my deepest condolences to his family and friends.

This week has been a period of national mourning. Sure, everyone is still going to school or going to work, carrying out with their daily activities, sometimes still cracking jokes and laughing... But the mood has never really been quite as sombre before. The documentaries on television, the images on the MRT station screens, the emotional posts on Facebook... And personally, listening to all the speeches by my school's principal, watching the flag brought down the half-mast, I was sad.

The worst thing is, while Mr LKY was alive, I never bothered to find out more about him and what he has done. I have even remembered scoffing at the idea of reading his biography some years ago. The father of modern Singapore? Back then, I could not bring myself to care. But recently, since his passing, I have learnt more about him and I can now appreciate his efforts properly. I feel like I have realised too late though. I guess, in my sad case, "You never know what you have until it's lost". Indeed, Singapore has lost someone extraordinary, but I believe that his spirit will live on for generations to come.

Thank you, Mr LKY.

I will not be talking too much about all he has done for Singapore, good or bad, though I am truly grateful for the good he has done and I respect his contributions.

But I am going to describe the queue to parliament house yesterday, as well as share my opinions on the video by Amos Yee and BBC article + Singapore's response (but really, should I even waste my time on that?).

Yesterday, at about 8.30pm, I met Valence, Zhiyong, Yee Theng, Joel and Jiawen at City Hall. We followed the crowd, walk-jogging to join the queue (we were in queue 3) and arrived at the tented area in the Padang at 9pm, where they predicted that we had to wait 8 hours. We sat there, talking about things, sometimes laughing (not so appropriate for the situation) and resting a little. Finally, at 12.30am, we got ready to move.

Summary: We sat for 3.5 hours at the Padang.

We followed the queue, stopping and starting and stopping and starting, complaining about the heat, and finally, we were out of the tented area at around 2am. There was a slight drizzle too, where we grabbed umbrellas for. By then I was a little tired and quite annoyed at how frequently we had to stop. Boy, I had no idea what was coming up next.

Summary: We took 1.5 hours to walk out of the Padang.

We started walking the loop at 2.45am. Stopping, starting, stopping, starting, stopping... It went on forever. I was mentally tired (from sleeping late the previous night) and my legs were tired (my right quadriceps were strained from S&W the day before, and still hurts now). We only walked into the floating platform at 4.15am. I mean, there was free water and food along the way, but it was quite a distance.

Summary: We took 2.25 hours to walk from the Padang to the floating platform.

From there, we had to do a complete U-turn and walk back straight towards the parliament house. It went a little faster, and we reached a "checkpoint" of a sorts at 5am, where the people told us we had about 1.5 hours to go, which raised an upcry. We had been queuing for 8 hours so far, so 1.5 hours more than the estimated time seemed like cruel joke to me.

However, at about 5.30am, we made it. We walked through the security checkpoint and into the parliament house, where we got that fresh blast of air-conditioning. When Mr LKY's portrait and coffin came into view, I felt like crying. I thanked him in my head, bowed and got out.

Summary: We took 1.25 hours to walk from the floating platform to the parliament house.

Then Zhiyong, Jiawen and I took the MRT to AMK, reaching there at 6.30am and had breakfast at McDonald's. I left AMK at about 8am, and not falling asleep on the bus ride was one of the most challenging things ever.

Was it worth the wait? Let's just say that even though that was a meaningful-ish experience I would never forget, I felt that all that time spent waiting was really too much. I felt the need to do it though, and I'm glad I didn't give up halfway.

For the next part, I would just like to say that I have done almost no research, and I won't be stupid enough to argue with anything that anyone has (or has not) said, simply because I don't know enough to back up any arguments I make. So I am going to remain rather neutral on these two cases.

And yes I also know that we shouldn't be making such a big deal about this, but I'm bored, so let's go.

The video by Amos Yee is essentially... Flaming Mr LKY? With a healthy dose of profanities, he talks about Mr LKY in a negative and in my opinion, a disrespectful manner. I suppose some of his points might be valid, but I don't know, and maybe some of his points are invalid. In my opinion, it is okay to discuss anyone's or anything's good and bad points, but I suppose you have to be sensitive to circumstances, as well as do it on the right platform, and in the right tone, so that your opinion will be constructive and it will benefit people. In the comments section of the video, people are arguing with him and each other, which disappoints me, as I am pretty sure this kind of conflict is exactly what Mr LKY doesn't want. I guess by adding this opinion in, I'm contributing to the conflict, but oh well.

I think I won't be talking about the BBC article, but here are links to the articles:
http://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-32090420
http://www.straitstimes.com/news/singapore/more-singapore-stories/story/gum-the-west-wrong-about-singapore-20150328

Rest in peace.

Thanks for reading this relatively formal post, sorry if it was very mundane.

Lynnette

I'm back. Seriously back.

I know I haven't exactly "quitted" blogging, but you know, I have been preeeetty inactive recently. but as mentioned in a blog post LONG LONG ago (actually, I think I mentioned it more than once before), I don't really want to blog regularly, and only post something when I have something I want to say. however I really think I should blog more, I guess. some blogs I've read recently have inspired me on this decision (not gonna do a mention here, but yeah). I mean, it's not like those blog owners post very regularly or anything, but their content is just so good.

UGH I JUST READ THE FIRST PARA AND LIKE. THE ENGLISH SOUNDS SO AMATEUR. WAS I ALWAYS LIKE THIS. SORRY D:

okay so how regularly will I blog? um, at least once a week.

also, why do I even keep a blog? I think I've been asked this more than once before. I actually keep this blog for myself in the future to read, so I can see how much I've grown and how my mindset/thoughts have changed over the years. it's really quite nostalgia-based, so sometimes the things I say is verbal-diarrhoea-like. just, whatever's in mind, goes into this blog. and when I read back sometimes, I realise I say some things that are really random or weird, but I know that at that point of time (of posting those posts), it wasn't random or weird (I had a reason for saying it), but I can't remember what it was supposed to mean.... which is quite interesting.

even when I couldn't tell

I really hope I remember what ^ that is even 5 years, 15 years, 50 years from now.

should I enable comments on my blog? idk it never really occurred to me that I should, since I have a ask.fm and stuff. but like, commenting is easier... right? idk I need advice. also, should I stop my habit of not capitalising the first word in every sentence? but then it looks like quite formal right, which this blog is NOT lol.

wow this post turned into a blog post about my blog hahahaha

I don't really know what to blog about. most people blog about their life? but my life is so good and normal and I really like it. I don't have any inner turmoils or whatever like a lot of people do (or THINK they do)

I mean, sure, my life ain't perfect. but seriously? just let it go man. life doesn't have to be perfect. some people's lives may be perfecter than yours, but lol so what? does it really matter? you might have the shittest life ever, but it's your life.

I sound like most unempathetic bitch on the planet. true, I've never been through a harsher situation than, let's say, being accused of breaking a cctv camera and getting into trouble for that, so my view might not be relevant to people going through serious issues (getting over an eating disorder/clinical depression, terminal illness, sexual abuse).

but for ALL YOU PEOPLE OUT THERE with NO actual issues and you're just making a big fuss out of NOTHING (or a SMALL something) aka being ridiculous on social media, because you think it's cool or because you want the attention of other people, PLEASE STOP. instead, give your OWN attention to people who deserve it. like me ;))) JKJK. but really.

if you're just faking emoness or rather, faking "happiness" (YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN), STOP IT RIGHT NOT. it's super obvious, and it's not cool. you think you're being so motivational? hahaha. hahahaha. yes, what a stronggggg person. bearing all your deep dark worries with a smile. #respect #inspirationalaward2015

unless you're doing it for shits and giggles then it's perfectly completely lax.

I mean, sure, sometimes I understand. you wanna complain about something online in a "tired" "my life sucks" "why am I so unlucky" kinda tone. that's okay. I do that too. just don't make it your entire online/offline life please. quite annoying.

the human race, quite funny sometimes.

I shall repeat, in case you didn't get it the first time. I am not referring to people going through serious issues. if you really really do have serious issues, stop telling people online anyway. they don't care. they don't even half-care. and the more you try to make them care, the worse the situation will be. I can't really provide alternatives (telling a trusted person is kinda the mainstream advice, but it isn't always like that), so either grit your teeth and bear with it (good luck), or seek professional help asap. I recommend the latter, but it's up to you.

tl;dr, don't be retarded. especially online. because I and other people can see your retardedness. and I can and will blog about it.

if I notice that you're doing it, and you mean something to me (like a friend), I might have already told you directly to stop it before. but sometimes I really misjudge, and there is a serious problem that you're facing, so I'm not gonna do that anymore. and yeah, people really hate it when their motives are being exploited anyway so

I feel quite contradicted, because I believe in freedom of speech, but I'm like advising people to keep some words to themselves. what. haiz...

conclusion: SAY WHAT YOU WANT. I won't care. I don't care.

SEE this is why I can never make a strong point.

even though it sounds like I have a huge problem with people who do the above ^^^^^, I actually really am not affected or bothered much. it's just an observation and an opinion, and I won't feel anything if you completely reject my advice lol

and it's also something I can talk about on this blog :D yay wow that was a lot of words.

HAHAHA I SOUND LIKE THE WHINIEST PERSON EVER I'm disgusting

okay I'm gonna go now bye. next week I'll blog again.

NNETT

[mobile] just some stuff.

Firstly, I think I might have mild insomnia. Super irritating and not cool. My mind is tired, my body is tired, but it refuses to rest. Whyyyy omg I'm typing this with my eyes half-closed and my brain hardly thinking. Not fun. But it's not like officially diagnosed so I might just be overthinking (online tests tell me that I might have insomnia though soooooooooo)

Can hardly keep my eyes open gosh. Anyway secondly, level tests just over, and according to every single teacher we suck. Like really suck. Like really.

I'm so tired.

Also... I forgot what I wanted to say.

Ah. I See Blue Black

It's quite sad how my blogposts are all so short nowadays I don't have much to say. I have a twitter account though @sushi_cat_ so I have somewhere else to write down things.

I HAVE SO MUCH WORK THIS WEEKEND.

Tired

Sometimes I still don't know if you're kidding or not.

Lynn <3 :'(

[mobile update]

Okay I had a weird dream last night.

I forgot most of the first part, but I think it was something weird too, I woke up multiple times.

The ending was me, my classmate Bruce, my classmate William, and I think my exclassmate Jiawen, and we were all walking out of school from the zebra crossing entrance and talking. Just before coming out, I noticed a green light coming from somewhere above the general office (principal's office?). Then suddenly William threw some weird fit (idk how to describe this) like, he suddenly stopped walking and shouted angrily or sth (which has never happened irl before, so it was weird). Then idk what happened, but he calmed down quickly and continued walking.

So then we walked out of school, and I commented to Jiawen how everything looked funny that day, like how everything looked clearer and more transparent (I didn't mention the green light in sch) but Bruce was like "no" in a pissed off tone so I was like "okok, no difference today"

Then after we crossed the zebra crossing, Bruce got into a weird mood and wanted to do math questions. Apparently in that world I labelled my files by weird names, and he was asking for a particular one (quite urgently, like he was scared that I had lost that file), though I forgot what the name was. I also happened to bring all my files that day, so I unzipped my bag and took out a purple file, and he accepted it even though that wasn't the one with the name he requested. He sat down and opened it (it had done and marked practice papers in it) and worked through a few questions in his head while I flipped around my bag and found the file that he wanted, which was pink, and he accepted it but continued working on the purple file. Then he decided it was enough, then we continued walking to Dover. I was to the right of Jiawen, Bruce was in front of me, and in front of Jiawen was William.

After we walked about halfway to the traffic light, we saw Mr Dennis walking from dover to school. I turned back and saw him standing at the grass there. Soon after that, a group of guys in S&W ran past us from dover to school as well. I turned back to look, and Mr Dennis TURNED INVISIBLE and the guys were gathering around him. I turned back in front and told them "he turned invisible" then they looked back at the grass area and nodded and then I woke up.

I speculated for a while after I woke up that there was a serial killer around school or something, but the school didn't want to tell us. How I came to that conclusion, I don't really know.

Anyway, that's all, so bye!

Lynn